Missing Caiden

Since last Thursday, our house has been a little more quiet. Caiden went back to "grammie & papa's" to spend a few days. Although the plan didn't originally work out as we had hoped, he was still able to stay and enjoy a few days in the snow. He loves being there alone so he can have all of grammie & papa's attention.

At first, the idea of him going to my parents house for a few days sounded like heaven to me. You see, Caiden is 3.5 years old. According to most of the mom's I know, it is not the terrible 2's you must worry about but the terrible 3's. And boy, have we had our share of terrible 3's. Lately, he's had more of an attitude and temper than he has ever had. I know this is totally normal and every child goes through this but I was hoping my child would just avoid all the attitude issues.

But now, we miss him! Even his little brother misses him. Dawson doesn't know what to do without Caiden to bug. Its been interesting watching Dawson adapt to a few days without someone to boss him around.

With all this said, it has reminded me of a poem that hangs on our refridgerator but I rarely read. I thought I would share it with you...mostly so that you can remind in a few days how much I missed my little guy, Caiden.

If I Had My Child to Raise Over Again by Diane Loomans

If I had my child to raise all over again,
I'd build self-esteem first, and the house later.
I'd finger-paint more, and point the finger less.
I would do less correcting and more connecting.
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites.
I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play.
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.
I'd do more hugging and less tugging.
I'd see the oak tree in the acorn more often.
I would be firm less often, and affirm much more.
I'd model less about the love of power, and more about the power of love.

Christmas & Family

We've enjoyed a wonderful Christmas week with our family. Caiden's eyes were as big as saucers when he got up on Christmas morning and saw that "Santa" had finally come. Dawson is still too little to know what is going on but he sure noticed the stuff under the tree. Then, we sang Happy Birthday to Jesus and had a great meal together. What a perfect day it was!

Oh...and to begin my new year's exercise program...you may just see me in the yard chasing around one of these!

Yummy Goodness

As most of you know, Saturday is our weigh in day for our group. It is a dreaded day most of the time and this morning was no exception. I haven't weighed in since December 8th so I knew that I probably was off track a little. I said "A LITTLE," so I wasn't expecting to be up 3.6 pounds. Ouch, this one hurt. On my drive home, I wondered why is was so bad.

My thought...I like to bake and I spent most of my "free" time this week in the kitchen mixing up wonderful, sweet concoctions of my family favorites. It was wonderful and relaxing. I am not a good cook but for some reason I can bake and I enjoy doing it for my friends and family. This week, I made peanut butter blossoms, date balls, peanut butter bon bons, no bake cookies, sugar cookies and puppy chow. It has been a tradition ever since we have been married for us to make and deliver special packages of these sweet treats to our friends and family. We made our deliveries yesterday - getting most of the yummy goodness out of the house. But, I don't think I stand a chance losing those 3 plus pounds this week with Christmas dinner and all. So, I'm counting on a fresh start (I know you are keeping track of how many times I say that) coming on December 26th. Anyone with me?



Here are our yummy packages ready for delivery.

Our Home At Christmas

So I'm a little late but BooMama is hosting a Christmas Tour of Homes. My friend, Carrie over at Three Girl Circus participated and it looked like fun (thank you Carrie for all your how-to-blog advice) so here's our contribution.

The stockings are hung by the chimney with care...

Our snow globe collection to remind us what it is doing "up north."

The "Reason for the Season."

"O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree..."

From our family to yours, have a very blessed and Merry Christmas.

Hanging Out

Every Wednesday, I have the opportunity to hang out with our church youth during their weekly worship service. I did just that tonight. After the main worship and preaching session, we break out in to gender specific small groups. As part of the girls small group, I've learned that we rarely stay on the sermon topic. So, as expected the conversation shifted and we started discussing pregnancy and just how "fat" (their words) you get. Boy...talk about humbling yourself and trying to shrink under my chair (as I'm dressed in a worn out pair of jeans and my favorite college sweatshirt with more than a few extra pounds around the middle). I didn't have the perfect body before I got pregnant so I never expected to ever have the perfect body after (and I certainly don't).

Now, believe me, I don't want the girls to think that being pregnant is cool (not exactly how I would describe it either) but I'd like for them to someday want children - even so I just kept my mouth shut and quietly thanked God for the two little blessings I have at home waiting for me. And, how every day I'm faced with the fresh and new challenge of being a mom of a preschooler and toddler. And, how I never once thought that the subject of motherhood could bring you so close to so many other women. Thank you God for making me a Mom. Now...I think I'll go find something to snack on!

All Grown Up

Well, it has finally happened. I have now gotten old enough that I no longer care for or really desire anything for Christmas. Sure, I will enjoy opening my gifts on Christmas morning. But, the excitement and adrenaline rush that I have is in shopping for the perfect gift for our two precious little boys. I'm finally all grown up. Realizing this now, I can't wait to see their faces on Christmas morning. Especially, knowing that they are getting one of these http://www.amazon.com/John-Deere-Gator-seat-belts/dp/B000G0KT6Y/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=toys-and-games&qid=1197436929&sr=8-1

Yes, I'm excited about the gifts and seeing the look on my children's faces. But, the most amazing thing this year is that Caiden is finally "getting it." Not the presents or the wrappings or the Santa Claus thing. He's getting the fact that the main reason we celebrate Christmas is because of the birth of our Lord, Jesus Christ.

Last weekend we attended an event where a church displayed a live nativity. You should have seen the wonder and excitement in his eyes. After waiting for over an hour, the wonder was starting to diminish from Dale and my eyes, believe me! But, that moment when Caiden saw the live nativity and (what was supposed to be) baby Jesus, sealed the deal for me. I knew in that instance that Dale & I are all grown up. I knew we had done the right thing in waiting all that time. I knew that Caiden was seeing the "big picture" and what we've been teaching him in his 3 years of life, is now starting to click. As a parent, it is the moment you dream about (even more than seeing their faces as they open their gifts on Christmas morning).

This year, I'm totally driven by the fact that Christmas needs to be bigger than the presents, the stockings and wrappings. It needs to be centered around the birth of Jesus and what He has done and continues to do in our lives. Our kids need to see that. That is what the wonder of Christmas is all about (even if you are all grown up!).

P.S. If you are keeping up with my weight loss, since Thanksgiving I've backsliden a bit (gained a few pounds). But, I'm back on track this week, working out and hopefully I'll be back down on Saturday when I weigh in.

What do you need? Accountability

Did you see this lady on Oprah? I didn't actually watch the show but I read her story online. Check it out... http://www2.oprah.com/health/weight/slide/20071128/slide_weight_tows_101.jhtml
She lost 500 pounds but didn't start losing until she started connecting with people in the outside world via a computer. She needed accountability and encouragement. Only at that point, did she begin realizing that she could win the weight loss battle.

That is what has happened with me. I needed the accountability and encouragement for my weight loss to be successful. But, that is not the only accountability I have in my life. I also have accountability for the spiritual aspects of my life. The sins I struggle with and the quiet times that I spend with God are shared with a few of my closest friends. Even Jesus showed that he needed accountability and encouragement in his life. He also provided it well as he talked and walked daily with his disciples.

So...why do we think we can be successful in any endeavor alone? The thing that held me back...pride! For a long time, I didn't want to admit to anyone that I struggled with weight (even though they could see it all over me!) or that I needed to be accountable for spending time with God. But, lately we have talking a lot about accountability in our church small group and needing it is a natural mechanism that God designed for us.

The challenge for you today...get accountability in your life! Find a friend or two that will help you through the rough parts of life and ask that they keep you accountable, whether you are trying to lose weight, quit smoking, have a sinful desire you are trying to stop or need to spend more time with God. Let's do this thing! I'll be praying for you!

Heaven - Michigan, same thing?

I apologize for my lack of blogging lately. We have been out of town (in Michigan) visiting our family for the Thanksgiving holiday. It was a wonderful, restful time spent with the people that we love and that love us unconditionally.

We returned to church yesterday recieving lots of hugs and "we missed you"s. That also truly touched our hearts. The cutest thing happened yesterday. One of my friends little girls ran up to me, threw her hands around my neck for a big hug and said to me, "We are so glad you are back from Heaven." Michigan - Heaven, same thing, right? Either way, that was Heaven just having hugs, knowing we were missed and back with our friends or should I say "family" again.

I haven't weighed in yet since my return so I'm trying to get back on track with my weight loss this week. The past 10 days were spent not caring about what I put in my mouth and totally enjoying every second of it. Oh...and also as promised in a prior post, I'm going to get back to the Y for exercise this week too. After a brief discussion with a friend yesterday, maybe we should just try to maintain during the Christmas season. That way, we can still enjoy the treats and really hit it hard in January.

Thank You Friends

Lately, our life has been a little crazy. For the past 5 weeks, our family has had our routine interrupted. Not due to anyone's fault but because our family is very scheduled, this has been hard on all of us. But what I've found out in the last 5 weeks has been incredible. Friends are the backbone of life. If you have good friends, you have a great life, no matter if its mountains or valleys that you are facing. God created each one of us for friendship.

I started my weight loss journey with 3 friends last January and 11 months later, we have a small network of about 7 of us that keep each other accountable and weigh in together each week. I couldn't do it without them. They are my cheering section and my worst critics too but I rely upon them for that.

But, its just not about losing weight. Its about a friend babysitting your child for 3 hours so you can get something done and not waiting for your response, just insisting and strapping him in her car. Its about having a house full of people and your friend still insisting that your kids can stay while you go to an appointment. Its about friends bringing meals when you are down and offering to take you to coffee when you need a girly chat and an evening away from it all.

That's what life is about. Relationships, friendships and doing life together. Thanks you gals for showing me something extraordinary in spite of my grumpiness these past 5 weeks. I love you and I'm thankful for you as this Thanksgiving day approaches.

"Greater love have no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13

Trade = Exercise for a new Room

I haven't been to our local Y to exercise since the middle of October. In spite of what everyone thinks, I really do like to work out. But, the quest to lose weight hasn't totally depended on that. I still lost 1.8 pounds this week. Yeah!

So what's been going on that I haven't made exercise a priority? While my mom was here visiting in October, we ran across a great new comforter set that I just loved. You know the rest of the story. The color on the walls in the master bedroom didn't match the new bedding so I had to repaint the walls. Then, the bathroom looked old and worn next to the new paint so I repainted that too. All of this painting took place during nap time. Its been crazy but it is finally done! See the pictures. I love to decorate and I always have fun with it. Oh...and don't forget to check out the Caiden Binder originals hanging on the wall. I was able to coax him in to doing that for his mom. : > ) (P.S. By the way, feel free to steal that idea if you ever need budget conscious art!) So, I guess that trading exercise for two newly remodeled rooms isn't so bad. Don't worry Y, I'll be back after Thanksgiving!

Shopping On a Budget

Last week, I managed to clean closets and sort out all of the clothes that I can no longer wear. I should be happy because they are just too big but it is also a little depressing, knowing that you just can't go out and replace your whole waredrobe. In a effort to recoup some funds to purchase some new clothes, I decided that I would have a yard sale. Despite an intense amount of effort between Thursday and Saturday, I made a modest $70.00. Not too bad for a yard sale but I had big plans for the money (buy new bathrooms things since I'm trying to redo our master bath and buy new clothes for Caiden, Dale and I). The money was just not going to stretch that far.

Then, the lightbulb went off. I have several "budget conscious" friends that have been shopping at our local Goodwill store and finding some great things. Dawson and I ventured there today. I'm proud to report that I got a almost new pair of Gap jeans for about $8.00 and two shirts for under $5.00 each and a pair of black boots for $6.00. I am so excited. Plus, I found a few little things for Caiden and two new pictures for our master bathroom. I guess shopping on a budget isn't so bad afterall.

Not great, but good!

I cannot tell you how happy I am that Halloween is over. We still have some candy left in the house but most of the "good" stuff has been eaten since last Wednesday. That's another great thing about still having lil' kids. They can go trick-or-treating for an hour max and be totally content with the amount of candy they get. I remember being an older kid and trick-or-treating for 2-3 hours and getting so much candy we didn't know what to do with it for months.

I weighed in on Saturday and was down .8 pounds. Woo Hoo! A big accomplishment for me this week especially since I didn't do well journaling or watching anything I put in my mouth. Its a new week and I'm back on track. Saturday's weigh in wasn't great but good so I have a little to celebrate. You keep on track this week too!

It's the most wonderful time of the year...

I love this time of the year, especially the part about it being fall. It has to be my most favorite season. However, it is not my favorite in the eating department. It is about this time of the year that I start to dread the holiday food smorgasbord. It involves everything from having a ton of Halloween candy in the house to a huge Thanksgiving dinner and leftovers to all the sweet treats and baking done before Christmas. You see, I started my weight loss trek just shortly after January 1st this year so I haven't yet gone through a holiday season having to watch my points and stay on track. So, I'm a little nervous and anxious about whole thing - more so because since Sunday, I have ate way too much candy. (I have to go back to the dentist today to have a temporary crown fixed because it came off while I was eating too many Tootsie Rolls yesterday.) I really need accountability in the next few months, especially since I'd still like to reach my goal by Christmas. Stick with me and help me through. I'll do the same with you because we still want it to be the most wonderful time of year - we just want to be a little thinner!

A good idea?

Have you ever had just one of those days? I know you have. Today was one of those days. The sky was gloomy, it was cold and wet and my mood totally matched it. Everything I planned never worked out and everything I touched fell apart. When I have a day like that, I tend to give myself permission to eat whatever I want. It is never a good thing. My mind often says "go ahead, you've lost a lot of weight so far and its a bad day, you deserve to eat it." So, today I have eaten so far: a sausage bisquit and coffee from McDonalds, Taco Bell for lunch, an extra helping at dinner and just now two fun size KitKat bars. This is what I wanted - "accountability," right? I just never really wanted to admit to everyone that I have days like this. And, only 2 days in to my blogging experience...was this really a good idea?

The 21st Century

Ok...so I've done. I've created a blog. I have a good friend who's been encouraging me to do this for a long time but I just haven't thought my life is all that exciting (and sadly, I still don't think it is). However, I am struggling with losing the last 25 pounds of the 75 I have wanted to lose and I'm trying this blogging thing for some accountability. Which means, that I'll be blogging about how I'm doing with eating and staying focused on my diet and exercise plan. So...hang in there with me and we'll see how this thing goes. Hopefully, I'll end up "losing it all" by Christmas!